My mother was very critical as I grew up. Probably because her mother was critical as she was growing up. The Bible says in Proverbs 21:19 “Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and nagging wife.” Proverbs 27:15 says “A quarrelsome wife is like the dripping of a leaky roof in a rainstorm;” So because of these I decided I did not want to continue that cycle. I wanted to do something different. So, what does a person to do?
In my life, and with experience as a counselor I have witnessed when ladies are upset, they may share with a friend what had happened. Then they share with another friend and another. It seems like every time the situation is shared, the emotions that are felt are just like when it happened the first time. Tensions stay high and the same emotions are felt; anger, frustration, hurt. Another reason to not share with others is so things don’t get repeated. It is okay to not share information that is not yours to share.
Sharing is only really helpful if the person is processing it with God. One of the things that I like to do is to journal. When I am upset about something, I go to God and my computer. I journal the event in as much detail as I can. Then I look at the situation and try to determine if there was any fault in me. I journal some more. As I process the situation, my anger starts to be less. I then think of how God would want me to respond to the situation. It is really my goal to be obedient to God. I journal again my response to God until it lines up with God’s desire for me. When I have finished, I am calm and more able to forgive and have reconciliation.